safety-lane.com 07105

chiropractic-lane.com

NEWARK
www.healthy-lane.com

Dr. Lane’s Thoughts VII



1) I have met several people in my life who feel a need to tell me that they have “a really good lawyer”.  Behind this declarative statement usually lies a few quick assertions:


a) This person has decided that they intend to sue me, someday.  What I need to point out is that this sentiment is not being said in the middle of an argument or during a heated exchange but probably said for no reason while sharing an event or just as two people in each other’s company.  It is always a non-sequitar.


b) This person will always take any disagreement with anyone to the most extreme levels and intends to pay another person (a lawyer) large amounts of money to “win” whatever they feel strongly about.


c) This person (usually a man) cannot compromise or settle anything.  Everything must be a 100% victory no matter the cost or the possibility of losing.  They consider a Pyrrhic victory to be a victory.  For those who do not understand this reference, click here.


d) This person is usually not intimidated by spending large sums of money just to be “right”.  They also usually have not idea of of “right” or “wrong”, just a bloodlust for victory.


e) Lawyers love these guys – they are probably at least 40% of a firm’s income.  I am just guessing with that number, but these are the clients who you never have to suggest another request for documents or spending another $3,000 – this client is always eager to spend more money.


It is only when the lawyer’s sense of morality or their inability to stop the flow of money or the failure of the lawyer to find yet another place to put all the cash (lawyers are routinely paid in cash or check) that the litigation stops.  The client never suggests that the case be closed.


As you can tell, I have had these types of problem people in my life, namely my ex-wife/her father (actually the same person in some ways), and two ex-bosses who couldn’t just let me leave without trying to “claw back” money.  For the record, my ex paid me $19K in a settlement and the two ex-bosses lost their cases, one before court when he decided that the money he spent had reached epic proportions for no chance of winning, and the other when the judge wouldn’t hear the case due to a lack actual stated damages (note: this was his lawyer’s fault but I am sure that he still got paid).


2) To be the best office in your profession or the best place to receive your services you must have 3 things happen:


a) You must love to do your job
b) You must be better than your competition and provide faster, better, and more courteous service.
c) You must allow your competition to be worse or fail to provide the service in a way that you can do: after hours, in a faster method, at a reasonable price, with courtesy, or even in a language that the patient needs (we have Spanish and Portuguese staff here).


I have run Chiropractic Lane and Safety Lane for 3 years and my competition continues to lose focus on success by always handing me every patient or client that they lose.  They don’t literally call me up but they do create issues that send all the work to me.


With that said, all I can say is “THANK YOU”(!!), both to my many patients (1,200 DOT exams in the last 2.5 years; we expect to do 1,000 this year alone), and to my many competitors who really aren’t real competition.


Our chiropractic patients send us all of their family and friends and our DOT patients (truck drivers, mostly) send us everyone who needs the exam, or a drug screen.


3) People who know me are aware that I have no sympathy for smokers. I hate the habit.


To me, smokers offer these a-z messages by their behavior (no particular order):


a) “I ruin my lungs and I want to ruine yours too”
b)”I am clueless on how to spend money intelligently”
c)”I can only make friends with people who share my addiction”
d) “I hate the health of babies and animals”
e)”I intend to destroy my health and I expect other people or the government to do their best to save my sorry ass when I, inevitably, need care for cancer, or care for asthma and emphysema”
f) “I have plenty of money to spend on clothing repair, drycleaning, that I will need each day that I wear any clothes I own”
g) “I will destroy the air of people that I know and of strangers”
h) “I am not too smart”
i) “I hate the health of my family and my children”
j)”I was born with good health and I am working hard to ruin it”
k) “I don’t trust the obvious information we have about the health hazards of smoking”
l) “If there is one thing I intend to do, it is support large multinational companies who have a defined interest in ruining my health and putting me in the position of supporting the lifestyles of their owners”
m) “I let other people define what ‘cool’ looks like”
n) “I will fight for my rights in keeping this addiction”
o) “I want the world to see me as a hero for protecting my right to smoke and, possibly, as a hero if I lose this habit”
p) “Someone told me that this will help me keep myself from gaining weight”
q) “I am lazy since I spend as much time leaving my desk to smoke as I do actually working”
r)”I am actually afraid of people and intimacy since I have created odors and tooth stains to turn people off from me”
s) “Food flavors are too intense, so I make everything bland by being unable to taste anything”
t) “The opportunity to be a walking fire hazard adds zest to my life”
u) “Advertising works on me because I am a sheep since it takes a useless habit and makes me desire it”
v) “When I set my mind to doing something foolish, I will not let logic stand in my way”
w) “Life is too long so I intend to do my best to die young and I have no problem taking those closest to me with me by shortening their lives also”
x) “Even after I leave a room, my second-hand smoke (in the air) can later kill people and my third-hand smoke (objects in the vicinity of smokers, such as curtains and windows, handles and surfaces) can kill people who come in contact with them”
y) “Aging is too slow and having young skin is for losers so I intend to look like a sagging diaper by 30”
z) “Since nicotine is an insecticide, it is good enough for me!”

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