How to overcome feeling lonely in a crowd (Roizon article)

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How to overcome feeling lonely in a crowd

Ever since the famous 1965 survey of adults in Alameda County, California, and the Whitehall study started in 1967 in Great Britain, we’ve known that having a posse (friends who support you) was one of the two most important factors in determining how long and well you’ll live. And we keep finding evidence.

A recent study in JACC: Heart Failure looked at around 12 years of data on more than 400,000 people and concluded that being lonely in a crowd bumps up your risk for hospitalization or death from heart failure by 15% to 20%. The researchers concluded: “the impact of subjective loneliness was more important than that of objective social isolation.” You see, you don’t need to be socially isolated to feel lonely — and that lack of connectedness, even though you are interacting with others, is particularly hard on your heart.

If that’s a familiar feeling for you, you can change that. Step 1 is to volunteer to help others. That act of generosity builds a sense of meaningful connection and purpose almost immediately.

Then, to enrich friendships and family relationships, set aside time to reach out. Select one friend or one family member to build a stronger relationship with. Make an effort to ask them about themselves, their feelings, challenges and pleasures. Suggest shared activities you both enjoy. Also, reach out to others you know with weekly catch-up phone calls. Taken one step at a time, you can fill your heart with warm connections — and help protect it from disease and damage.

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