Dump demands Zelenskyy admit that Dump play volleyball better than ‘any girl’ (Trump parody)

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Dump demands Zelenskyy admit that Dump can play volleyball better than ‘any girl’

In a surprise press conference, President Dump demanded that Volodymyr Zelenskyy, President of Ukraine, admit that Dump can play volleyball better than ‘any girl on any team just because they are girls.’  Mr. Zelenskyy stated that he would not admit to this point because ‘it just isn’t true!”


“Payton McNabb said it was true and she’s a girl and she plays volleyball”, Mr. Dump reminded the reporters at the press conference.


President Dump continued with other issues he stated “must be resolved before peace talks can continue”.  The president pointed out that Zelenskyy must concede that Crimea is part of Russia, that Mr. Dump is a ‘Master Negotiator’, the moon is made of ‘green cheese’, that Mr. Dump has ‘beautiful hair’, and that “Dumb and Dumber” is the greatest movie ever made (“I still laugh right through it every time I watch it”, stated Mr. Dump.

Mr. Zelenskyy made it clear to reporters that all of these issues are ‘not important’ and that ‘many are not related to the peace process and Mr. Dump is using them to favor Russia in negotiations.”

In reports from Russian television, Mr. Putin stated, “Mr. Dump is correct on everything he said and I support him 100% on all issues related to these easy concessions which will continue the peace process and bring Ukraine back to us.”
 

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